Lutèce my Great Dane merle

I've always wanted to have a Great Dane as a dog, but 10 years ago I couldn't afford the price.

Then one day I heard a lady on the radio selling a female Dogue puppy at a price I could afford.

I immediately called the lady to ask her to reserve her for me until the evening, and I called my husband to let him know.

So that evening we arrived at the lady's house and I saw this famous puppy that looked like anything but the image of a Great Dane I'd had in my mind.

She was a variegated gray, a color I didn't know at all. I wanted a harlequin, but this was even prettier, as she was gray with black spots.

I took my dog with me, and when I left the lady's house, my good Lulu had only one cry of tear, and then everything went well. The next day I took her to the vet for tattooing, vaccination and a check-up. At two and a half months old, she weighed just 6 kg. The breeder had told me about the birth by caesarean section, then about the mother who didn't want her puppy, and as this lady didn't have enough money to give her formula, my Lulu was raised on cow's milk and then on cheap kibbles without going through the puppy mill.

Anyway, we gave her vitamins and everything she needed to get back into shape, and within a month she had doubled her weight.

Unfortunately, all the deficiencies she'd suffered had taken their toll, and after a few months pimples appeared (due to a lack of immune defenses).

Then lameness, and finally I really wondered if she could see properly, as she was bumping into things. The hophthalmologist told me she couldn't see out of one eye due to a tilted retina. Of course, she was in agony, and I must admit that several times I wanted to put her out of her misery, but the vet always told me there was hope. She had glaucoma in one eye, then the eye burst under the pressure, then it was the second eye's turn. I kept anti-pain injections in the fridge, and when she really felt the pain, she would go and scratch at the door to give her a shot. As an adult, she never weighed more than 45 kg, and that was when she was in good shape. Despite her blindness, she followed me everywhere on horseback and I can tell you that she made a few Km. She followed my voice and the horse's pace. You'd think the horses knew that when they were galloping, I could always see the eye watching to see if Lulu was following, and if she wasn't, they'd slow down on their own. All I had to do was say look out and she'd stop walking and move aside, all to avoid the obstacles in the street.

She knew all the sounds and what they meant. She never betrayed me, I was always proud of her and I loved her so much. Talk of her and I'm filled with sadness and tears.

One day a branch made a hole in her chest and the vet sewed it up without putting her to sleep (because he was afraid her heart wouldn't take the anaesthetic)Of course she was spoiled rotten the bed and everything else was for her. But you could feel that she only lived for me. I didn't go on holiday so as not to upset her.

At one year old, the vet told me that if he reached 4 years old, it would be an achievement, but at 8 years old, beautiful Lulu was still with us. Then, last August, she had a stroke (due to eye disease). The vet had always told me that the disease would go up the optic nerve and attack the brain, and at 6 years of age, removing her eyes was a tough decision for me. So I took her straight to the vet, who treated her for the stroke. I could feel that her strength was diminishing, so I only went for rides for her, because I would have killed her with grief if I'd stopped taking her along, and for her it was hard to keep up, so we went for short rides at reduced paces. Then, on October 26, 2004, I went into the forest and realized that Lulu didn't want to come along, and she didn't seem well at all. So I went for a walk on my own, and when I came back I found my sweetheart in the bathroom with her tongue out, and it was all blue.

I took her to the vet but she had to be carried to the car and in my head it was the end, I had to bring her back but no longer of this world. The vet looked at her and took her fever, which had gone down to 36°. I told him I didn't want to see her suffer any more, that she'd had enough, but he wouldn't listen. He told me he would give her a treatment for the night, to put her near a source of heat to warm her up, and that the next day we would make a decision. I did everything he told me, but the poor thing was so frightened of what was happening to her that her stomach flipped, and as luck would have it, our vet was away on an emergency call. I had to call another vet, but when he arrived my big wolf was in a coma and we put an end to her life. She left in my arms, tears streaming down her cheek.

It's true that she wasn't a beautiful dog, and I spent a fortune on her care, but I can assure you that for me she was the most beautiful, and if I had to do it all over again, I'd do it with pleasure, despite the anxious nights I spent with her.

Now she's lying next to the house and I hope she's in doggie heaven, because she really deserves it. I've since taken in another one whom I love and adore, but she's not my Lulu d'amour. She'll always be in my heart. I don't believe in God, but every time I pass by her grave I feel as if she's drawing me to her to tell me something. And I answer her.

Annick Letellier